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planetnaty wrote:
 If I was born with perfect hearing would i be the anti government outdoors authority hating guy i am today or would i be normal and have a perfect family and wife and be politically correct.I think being born the way i am had a big impact on me i recenty started biting back after being bit for so many years.I wonder ...
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Well none of us can change how we are born and what happens to us health wise. 5 months ago I never thought I would be going through what I am right now. Over the past 3 years or so I knew my hearing was a SMALL problem. Then all of a sudden out of nowwhere all these other issues pop up. I have born deaf family members (none of which were my parents, uncle aunt and 2 cousins) And here I am the lucky one that gets diagnosed with a disease that has played havoc on my life since the day it came into it. Like a friend here said to me when I first found out, Some things that have happened are a pleasant surprise and other things have not been so great. Its hard living in a world where EVERYONE you know is hearing. They think because I have hearing aids I can hear things properly and everything they say. I struggle daily because I have always been the person who entertains and is involved in every conversation. Now I sit back and kind of watch what is going on because it is very hard for me to understand them.
Someone pointed out a video to me that was an open letter to me. I watched it and the truth is, Yes I was hearing at one time. What some Deaf people do not understand and get is that it is very hard to make a transition into a world where you know nothing except what you learn. I am thankful for the fact that I have the writing skills and grammar now that I wouldnt maybe have had before. Hearing people automaticly think because you still have SOME hearing you can hear, Deaf people think because I can hear a little I hear everything but its going, I have struggled with losing more and more hearing. The first hearing aids I had were pushed to the limit within a month and a half of having them. Now I have new ones. Being the site moderator has been a complete blessing to me. It has opened up a small part of the Deaf community for me and is helping this transition to be a little better. When I get frustrated with people in my life I come here and read and interact with everyone here. I love that I can do that and not feel weird about it or feel frustrated.
So naty, the answer is I know I was born different, I don't waste my time wondering. I live my life with no regrets and I don't get angry at the world for being naive and intolerant. You will find it is a terrible way to live day to day. I go with the flow, I may shed a few tears here and there but this is who I am, hearing, HOH and eventually Deaf. Its me, love me or love me not, screw everyone else smile
