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The Autumn Breeze
Posted On 09/30/2008 16:54:10 by candybrowneyes

I sit outside with the sun shining upon my face, the breeze in my hair and over my skin.  The sound of the wind going through the bushes and trees seems so peaceful because it is. When I am writing and I am alone with mother nature all around me it seems as like nothing terrible could ever happen. But its not true.

Within the last few months my hearing has taken a significant plunge. It scares me and worries me because there are so many things I love to listen to, to hear.  A couple of weeks ago I had an appointment with my audiologist and the new tests aren't looking good.  I put on the new hearing aids which help a great deal but the dreaded words I hated to hear came from his mouth.  "Shawna, I'm not going to tell you that your hearing will stay this way and I am not going to tell you that you will not lose more, but these will help."

I was tired of not hearing people or hearing things I was used to. But now I worry about the days I won't get to hear the leaves russle around, the wind go through the trees, the laugh of my nieces and nephews or even the voices of the ones I love. It hurts because I don't have a lot of people around me who know what I am going through, as a matter of fact I don't have anyone who does really.

Its getting tougher and late at night when I am all alone I cry.. just so no one can see how much it really affects me...

Tags: Autumn Hearing Sound



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Viewing 1 - 4 out of 4 Comments

From: Dazakiwi
10/03/2008 17:00:58

I'm in the same boat too, my hearing has dropped recently too. Last time it had dropped significantly was 5 years ago. Im suppose to be getting a newer aid in the next few months. But ive been having a problem also with my balance and vertigo which seem to happen around the time my hearing drop. I have had this problem off and on in the past, it can give me a funny head where i feel alittle woesy and sometimes leads to full blown vertigo, where i have to lay down.

I've have noticed my tinnitus seems to have changed alittle too. And it has occured to me perhaps one day i will be completely deaf.  Im another one who loves music, and i wonder if i will remember sound of songs i like. I can often have a song or tune stuck in my head, and the great thing about memory is words or images can trigger a memory.

So i guess if you read the lyrics to a song it will all come back to you. Its funny how songs can take you back to your teens or a period in your life.

I think its worse to have full hearing and then suddenly lose it all, i mean thats some big adjustment. As for me, im in the middle, my hearing loss since birth was normal to me, never had anything to compare it with to whats normal hearing. And when my good ear had a major hearing loss to the point i had to get a hearing aid for it, my social life drastically  changed too, but ive always been like an observer in a social situation anyway, it just became more so. Its amazing what you can see and read with your eyes. It has been said its better to be deaf than blind. And i think its true. Er this was suppose to be an encourage comment, but i waffled on a bit hehe (im a rambler sometimes). I guess to sum it up you arent the only one in the boat. And the internet is a blessing, if it were 15 years ago we wouldnt be on this website, wouldnt be able to chat to people without having to listen, nor would our hearing aids be as advanced, no dvds around that has subtitles for movies. So sometimes we need to count our blessings for what we do have in life. To take care on what we choose to focus on in life.




From: Spelchek
10/01/2008 01:27:45

You will miss these sounds as they become memories instead of sounds. I copied a blog I wrote on another site, describing my experience a bit...........................................................


OK so why am I posting music on my page? Well, I mentioned that I was not always this way. I am stuck in a time warp musically. The end came during the height of Nirvana/Pearl Jam/Black Crowes era. Sudden loss in right ear was acceptable, but large changes in left was too much to overcome. To those that have experienced this type of fate in life, I fully understand. I would like to say that not being able to converse in normal fashion was my biggest loss; hey, that sure looks good. But in all honesty, it was the loss of music: soul searching music, heart thumping music, angry white male music, pleasant jazz music, beer drinking blues guitar and harmonica music, wonderful electronic music, amazing Jimi Hendrix guitar solo music, cutting edge music (whatever is new) and the list will never stop. I can still recall so much from memory. Never got to test the waters of Rap/HipHop, but the beat is great.


So I will continue to post music on my page; things I recall enjoying in times gone by. For those that never heard music, I am almost jealous. You cannot mourn what you never had; when music created your mood and shifted it; when it helped you overcome bad days, helped you celebrate the good days. To those that still hear, be glad that today you can find solace in the sweetness that is music...



From: sweetfairy
09/30/2008 23:02:23

YU are not alone  ....    I have  a couple of friends that  had went through this  also  ......     



From: Nita
09/30/2008 17:05:20

wow good friend nita





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